~ Unique Human - Izaya Orihara x Reader ~

"Oh, [Name]-chaaan~" The raven-haired informant's voice rang throughout the large room. No answer. A small grin appeared on your face as you heard him get up from his chair and approach the sofa you were currently occupying. Stopping directly in front of you, a pair of crimson eyes bore down at you.


"Hello Izaya-kuuun~" You finally answered, mocking him in a sing-song voice.


"Where is it?"


"What on Earth could you be referring to, Izaya-kun?" You asked, trying to hide a smile from your boyfriend's obviously irritated state.


"My cell phone, [Name]-chan. Where did you put it this time?"


From the very first moment you met him, Izaya took every possible opportunity he had to annoy or tease you in one way or another.
After a month or so of his relentless tactics, you decided to start giving him a taste of his own medicine. You initiated your revenge by getting a certain angry, street sign wielding ex-bartender to catch the informant off-guard one day.
After that success, you did little things to get back at Izaya, such as hiding his beloved cell phone from him.
Claiming you were an 'exceptionally interesting human', you slowly developed a bond, and ultimately a relationship, with Izaya Orihara.


"Well, I can't seem to remember right now. Where did I put your precious cell phone? Hmm... Did I throw it in the outside garbage can? Or perhaps I dropped it in the toilet earlier today." You teased, standing up and moving a few steps away from the informant.


"That's not very nice, [Name]-chan. You should know better than to hide my phone. Maybe you need a more severe punishment than last time~" Izaya smirked, taking a step towards you.


"Whatever... flea."


In an instant, the raven haired informant had you pinned to the wall. It wasn't long after meeting him that you discovered a word Izaya hated more than Shizuo himself. And that word was what Shizuo commonly called Izaya. Flea.


"Did you know that fleas have a habit of draining the blood from other living creatures?~" He stated, keeping a firm grip on you.


"Are you sure you're not thinking of a leech?" You asked, struggling against Izaya to no avail.


"There's one major difference between fleas and leeches, [Name]-chan."


"Oh? And what's that?"


In one swift movement, Izaya pulled out his switchblade. Holding it towards your neck, he leaned in close to your ear. "Fleas bite."


"Not if the flea gets squished first." You  retorted, trying to keep a calm demeanor. You knew all of Izaya's tricks to attempt to get the upper hand in situations such as these. Unfortunately for Izaya, you weren't very willing to give into him so easily.


"You know, [Name]-chan... That mouth of yours is going to get you into a lot of trouble one of these days." He said, tapping the blade gently against your cheek. "However..."


"However?" You asked, urging him to continue.


Flipping his switchblade closed and returning it into his coat pocket, Izaya pulled you close to him. "Your mouth is one of the many reasons why you're my favorite human~"


"S-Shut up, Izaya." You replied as your face heated up from embarrassment.


Before he could respond, the front door was ripped from it's hinges and thrown into Izaya's computer desk.


Your face paled. "Oh shit. Not now."


"IZAYAAAAAAAAAA!!!" The blonde ex-bartender entered the room, an enraged look on his face. "Why the Hell are people saying that we're in a sexual relationship?!"


You smiled sheepishly as Izaya gave you a stern look.


"Ehehe... um... I love you?" You said, trying to avoid eye contact with him as he continued to stare down at you.


"Answer me, you damn flea!" Shizuo yelled, lifting a bookcase over his head, ready to hurl it in your direction any moment.


"I-Izaya! Let me go! Please, I don't want to die by a flying bookcase!" You pleaded, trying to push yourself away from Izaya.


Snickering at you, Izaya gave you a quick kiss before pushing you into Shizuo. As Shizuo dropped the bookcase to prevent you from falling, Izaya took the opportunity to slip past the both of you.


"Get back here, dammit!" Shizuo yelled, leaving your side and quickly chasing after your boyfriend.


After a moment, you let out a deep sigh. "At least that will keep Izaya busy for a while." You said to yourself, pulling out Izaya's cell phone from your back pocket. "Hm, let's see... I wonder if Erika wants to go shopping for manga with me~ "


- Extended Ending -


"IZAYAAAAAAA!!!!" The blonde's voice echoed throughout Ikebukuro's streets as he chased after the informant. "Get back here, you bastard!"


As Shizuo grabbed a nearby vending machine and hoisted it above his head, Izaya reached into his pocket. But as half-expected, said pocket was empty.


"Why am I not surprised?" Izaya questioned himself with a sigh as he narrowly dodged the vending machine flying towards him.


"First my phone, now my switchblade." Izaya paused for a few moments before a wide smile spread across his face. "Hahaha!~ Humans are just so interesting!~" He laughed as he dodged a flying street sign before running in the opposite direction.


"But no human could ever be quite like my [Name]-chan~"